Kids Are Funny

I would have entitled this post, "Someday I'll laugh," but I have to say that I've already laughed a lot about each of these recent events. We shall see if they come across as funny written as they do orally!

#1: A couple of weeks ago, as I was making lunch, I heard my boys laughing and screeching hysterically. They came running into the kitchen with wet hair. They often wet their hair in the sink, so I didn't think too much of it. I even touched Grant's hair and said, "Boy, your hair is all wet." Jack explained, very excitedly, that they had stuck their heads in the toilet twice to get it wet. When I said, "EWWWW!", Jack replied that there hadn't been any pee in it. And there you go--according to kids it's okay to play in the toilet if there is nothing in it. Hopefully they have learned that is really NOT the case!

#2: Last week I took the kids by myself to my parents' house in St. Louis. Ryan had to spend 9 days in CO grading AP essays, and I confess I begin twitching when I think of spending that long alone with the kids--so we visit the grandparents! :) On the way, Jack said he needed to use the restroom, and I needed some iced coffee so we stopped at McDonald's. The problem was that Grant was sleeping. It took me 5 minutes to get the child out of the car (mind you, I'm also holding Caroline as I try to get him out of the van!) and another 5 to convince him to use the restroom. In the meantime, Jack is done and teasing Grant, who is responding by screaming and wailing at the top of his lungs. He finally goes into the stall, but after finally peeing begins sobbing because he cannot get his pants up. (Keep in mind that I still have Caroline in one arm!) He proceeds to sit down on the bathroom floor (EWWWW again!!) and pull up his pants and put on his shoes. (Did I forget to mention they'd fallen off, too??) I hoisted him up to wash his hands (one kid under each arm--thank goodness that Caroline is such an easy going child right now!), which caused his shirt to get wet which again led to top-of-his-lungs wailing! Needless to say, I'm sure the entire restaurant was glad when we left, though no one would make eye contact as I dragged my children out of the place. And of course, it was right then that Ryan called from the Denver airport to tell me that he'd landed--no children in tow, no rest stops with screaming kids...he didn't know what he was missing until I informed him. I swore I would not stop again on the drive but forgot the problem with giving my child water when I order coffee--it leads to another "gotta go" moment. Fortunately, this one was slightly less eventful and a bit faster, but these were definitely NOT my shining moments as a mom!

#3: Okay, I will say that I feel a bit guilty laughing about this one because of what was ruined, but it really is funny. (Is your curiosity piqued?) Grant is my little colorer. (Is that a word?) He loves to color and has always done much better with his pictures at church and at school than Jack did. So, the other day at my parents' house, when Jack came upstairs and said that Grant was coloring with markers, I did not think too much of it. Then he followed it up with, "They're permanent." I rushed downstairs and found Grant sitting on the floor, legs wide open without underwear (he'd just had an accident), coloring his, ahem, boy parts as well as the one-year-old white carpet. The carpet did not have the majority of the coloring, fortunately, and the artistry that went into completely covering his crotch area (I just don't think I write the real word here!) was pretty amazing...and hilarious. Seriously, I am laughing about it as I write--red and green. Oh so funny. I'm not sure if my mom found it quite as humorous, and I feel bad when I think about the carpet. However, the mental picture is just too much!

I know I'll compile a great amount of stories as the kids grow, but these all happened within a few days and remind me that it is a good thing to have a sense of humor with kids!